A WOMAN'S POEM:
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks..
I pray he's rich and self-employed,
And when I spend, won't be annoyed.
Pull out my chair and hold my hand..
Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me queen.
A man who loves to cook and clean.
I pray this man will love no other.
And relish visits with my mother.
A MAN'S POEM:
I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with
Big tits who owns a bar on a golf course,
And loves to send me fishing and drinking.. This
Doesn't rhyme and I don't give a crap.
Which Reminds me,
MY WIFE WON'T LIKE IT
One day I accidentally overturned my golf cart.
Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa
on the golf course, heard the noise and called out:
"Are you okay, what's your name?"
"Its Jack and I'm Okay thanks," I replied.
"Jack , forget your troubles. Come to my villa, rest a while
and I'll help you get the cart up later."
"That's mighty nice of you," I answered, but I don't think
my wife would like it."
"Oh, come on," Elizabeth insisted.
She was very pretty, very sexy and persuasive . . . I was weak.
"Well okay," I finally agreed, and added, "but my wife won't like it."
After a restorative brandy, and some creative putting lessons,
I thanked my host: "I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife
is going to be really upset."
"Don't be silly!” Elizabeth said with a smile: “She won't know anything.
By the way, where is she?"
"Under the cart!" I said . . .
ONE MORE
An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 AM and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
The man replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects alcohol, staying out late, and smoking have on the human body.
The officer then asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"
The man replied, "That would be my wife."
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks..
I pray he's rich and self-employed,
And when I spend, won't be annoyed.
Pull out my chair and hold my hand..
Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me queen.
A man who loves to cook and clean.
I pray this man will love no other.
And relish visits with my mother.
A MAN'S POEM:
I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with
Big tits who owns a bar on a golf course,
And loves to send me fishing and drinking.. This
Doesn't rhyme and I don't give a crap.
Which Reminds me,
MY WIFE WON'T LIKE IT
One day I accidentally overturned my golf cart.
Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa
on the golf course, heard the noise and called out:
"Are you okay, what's your name?"
"Its Jack and I'm Okay thanks," I replied.
"Jack , forget your troubles. Come to my villa, rest a while
and I'll help you get the cart up later."
"That's mighty nice of you," I answered, but I don't think
my wife would like it."
"Oh, come on," Elizabeth insisted.
She was very pretty, very sexy and persuasive . . . I was weak.
"Well okay," I finally agreed, and added, "but my wife won't like it."
After a restorative brandy, and some creative putting lessons,
I thanked my host: "I feel a lot better now, but I know my wife
is going to be really upset."
"Don't be silly!” Elizabeth said with a smile: “She won't know anything.
By the way, where is she?"
"Under the cart!" I said . . .
ONE MORE
An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 AM and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
The man replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects alcohol, staying out late, and smoking have on the human body.
The officer then asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"
The man replied, "That would be my wife."
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